Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck are getting a divorce, and if you’re wondering what their exes think about *gestures around* everything going on, there’s a kinda yikes update. While J.Lo’s ex Alex Rodriguez is out here posting cryptic musings for everyone to read into, Ben’s ex Jennifer Garner is focusing on supporting the actor…and apparently, she feels low-key “used” by the Atlas star.

“Jen feels slightly used as a pawn in J.Lo’s bid to repair her marriage,” a source tells the Daily Mail, noting that the Deadpool & Wolverine actor “doesn’t believe it was intentional.” That said, her friends think the whole situation was out of line

“She was put in the middle and her friends think—no matter how you look at it—a man’s ex-wife should never have to play mediator in a divorce from his new wife,” the insider explains before adding, “Especially when said wife was a big love who Jen was compared to throughout their 13-year marriage.”

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Apparently, Jen is just “happy that Ben is now happy.” And when it comes to her relationship with J.Lo, they’re still friendly…just not hanging-out-grabbing-dinner-levels of friendly.

“In the end, Jen Garner always has Ben’s back and although she does consider J.Lo a friend now, no one sees this blossoming further,” the person close to the sitch says. “They will likely not be hanging out and going on bike rides together in the Hamptons.”

Just FYI, J.Lo does seem to be staying close to Ben and Jen’s kids. In fact, she was seen shopping with their son Samuel earlier this month!